Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
What a dumb baby whore.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
