Dual....:-)
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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