Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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