Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
