So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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