Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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