i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Randomize
