My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
