is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
