She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
