My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
