My brain says no but my pants say off.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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