A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize