just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
