Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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