the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
