It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
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