watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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