I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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