I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
you didnt know i had herpes?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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