i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
