I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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