she looked like the bat from fern gully.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
