i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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