I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
