so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
