Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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