There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
