I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I stole a fireplace last night.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
