I don't think brook has ever known best
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
