Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
