mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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