I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
