Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
