girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
