are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
