whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
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