I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
That's intense
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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