I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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