we're blogging at a bar
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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