we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Randomize
