its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
