i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize