I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
