My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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