And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
