No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
