well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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