The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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