I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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