belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I need a burrito and a hug.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
